West Coast Trip - Win One Lose One

Two games out of three are out of the way on the Bruins west coast swing. All things considered, I'll take the results and I'm betting Claude Julien would agree.

On Wednesday the Bruins fell 4-3 to the surging Anaheim Mighty Ducks (I still call them that, fuck Disney). Then, in what has to be one of the worst scheduling breaks of the season for any team, the banged up Bruins had to hop up to San Jose last night for a tilt against the NHL's best team (they finished the night tied with Chicago for the points lead). Oh yea, for those east coasters out there, SJ isn't a 45 minute flight from LA, its a real plane ride.

The Bruins somehow managed to withstand a 42 shot barrage from the Sharks and thanks to Timmy and a flurry of good forechecking by, well...I don't know what the hell line they are anymore but - by the Whitfield-Paille-Thornton line, the Bruins snuck into a shootout where Chara bombed a slapshot 5 hole on Nabokov for the 2-1 win.


Chara logged something like 27 minutes of icetime last night and frankly, i don't know how he's going to be upright after the Olympics at this rate. I can't believe i'm saying this, but we need Mark Stuart like Haiti needs purified water right now. Fortunately, both appear to be on their way to their respective destinations.

If the Bruins pull a Kurt Russel and snake their way out of LA on Saturday, they'll have managed 4 out of 6 points against 3 very solid teams in 4 days, all with a blatantly depleted roster.

Paging Mr. Chiarelli - trade deadline is less than 6 weeks away. More thoughts on that later, especially since NESN seems to think the B's brass has interest in an aging PP specialist with no PP goals this year (no, i'm not talking about Sergei Gonchar, we did that once). James Murphy...why the blank would we want an overpaid Sheldon Souray (3-9-12 in 30 games and no PPG)?

Bruins Flat - Handled by Rangers

As I watched the Ranger fans rise in excitement towards the end of the first period yesterday, it was instantly clear to me the Bruins were already on the ropes. Marco Sturm's missed penalty shot was the chance the young Bruins team had to grab momentum in this game - a chance that went right by the wayside. Despite only being down 1-0 at that point and outshooting the Rangers through the end of one period, the Bruins were a team on the ropes from the first faceoff yesterday and this will remain the case against most teams for the next few weeks.

Offense is key, and no doubt the absence of Marc Savard and Patrice Bergeron is going to be front and center with every broadcast of a B's game over the next 2-4 weeks. The bigger problem this team faces though, is the lack of depth on the blueline. Last year, when Andrew Ference, Aaron Ward and Dennis Wideman missed extended periods of time, the Bruins were able to tap into a plethera of defensive reserves chomping at the bit down route 95 in Providence. Guys like Matt Hunwick stepped up and showed how deep the organization was in young, talented defenseman. This year? Not the case.

As I witnessed firsthand yesterday, there is no Matt Hunwick or Matt Lashoff waiting in the wings this season to step up. All three goals in the Bruins 3-1 loss to the boys from NYC were a result of defensive lapses that can be specifically pinpointed to a young, inexperienced defensive corps. I'm betting if I told you at the start of the season that the Bruins' momentum in mid-season would be most jeopardized by the loss of Mark Stuart and Andrew Ference, you'd have laughed it off. But let's take a look at the replacements for these guys...

Johnny Boychuk - 24 career games played and personally responsible for the second goal last night. He made a number of mental mistakes giving up the puck in his own end or at the opposing blueline. Worst of all was his overreaction to a bump from Brandon Dubinsky in the second that led to Dubinsky scoring the second NY goal.

Adam McQuaid - 5 career games played. McQuaid looked amazingly slow to the puck last night (worse than Mark Stuart, believe it or not) and is a -4 in these first 5 games.

Now granted, Boychuk is promising offensively and set a franchise record with 66 points from the blueline for the P Bruins last year, but he's basically a bigger, slower Dennis Wideman with a harder shot. Good for offense, not so good for a team that is built on keeping the puck out of the net.

Finally, when a pretty good team loses top players like Savard and Bergy, the other top players have to be playing at their peak, and guys like Chara simply were not yesterday. Z made a really poor decision pinching up on the first Ranger goal yesterday which left a 3 on 1 behind him down in the slot. This kind of breakdown kills a team that's already on the ropes.

The Bruins need to weather the storm out west for a week or so now. How much water they take on is going to depend on these young d-men.

GNH: Bruins Impeach Senators

B's score early, often

Wheeler stops being a bitch

Sens still can't beat Tim

Atlanta Brings the JV Goalie, Loses 4-0

B's fire up scoring

Chase Pavelec once again

Tuuk leads the boys home

B's Salvage .500 Road Trip

Technically, the Bruins come home .500 on this latest road trip, having gone 1-1-1. The recent trip is easy to see-saw on. On one hand, you had a decent showing against the best team in the Western Conference on the road and lost on a night where the defense was hampered by injury playing back-back games. Then to rebound, they corrected their mistakes (better neutral zone play, capitalized on scoring chances) and beat a divisional foe that was ahead of them in the standings 2-0. Not bad.

The flip side is that you went 0-2-2 before the Ottawa win last night and continue to show a lack of offense against weaker foes (2 goals combined against TOR/OTT makes NO sense at all).

Bergeron and Krejci are practically carrying the team at this point and that's NOT a good sign when you look at their half decent numbers:

Bergeron 9-18-27 +5; Krejci 7-12-19 -1.

Those aren't blowing anyone's hair back...and they are first and third respectively in team scoring. So we need what we've needed since day one this year: More production from the top 6 forwards. The Bruins have scored just 90 goals this year (only the Hurricanes have fewer) and last night, Marco Sturm netted his 10th of the year to become the first Bruin with double digits in the goal column. So how are we six games over .500? We've allowed the 5th fewest goals, as well. Despite Thomas' struggles, we're a +3 in goal differential.

I'm not breaking any new ground here, i recognize, but it goes to the heart of the matter to note that this Boston team is capable of bigger things. Are they a cup contender as comprised right now? No. But can they compete for the division and remain a top 6 team through to the deadline in February? Absolutely, so long as the offense comes around.

Up next: 3 straight against the Southeast (Atlanta, tomorrow at 7pm is up first).

Guest Spot - First Quarter Awards

Guest writer Tony Cappuccino gives us a quarter-post awards and prediction column, below...

The Boston Bruins swept through the NHL Awards Banquet in Las Vegas last summer: Tim Thomas, Zdeno Chara and Claude Julien all took home hardware (as well as a Jennings Trophy that the slightly-less deserving Manny Fernandez also had a share of). Just beyond the quarter post of the 2009-2010 NHL Season, Caveman takes a look at how that awards ceremony would unfold were it held this evening.

Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender): Ryan Miller, Buffalo Sabres

While Marty Brodeur’s pursuit of every mark in the goaltending record book has taken center stage this season, Ryan Miller has quietly pieced together a masterful first quarter to the 2009-2010 campaign. He is currently first in save percentage (.935) and goals against average (1.90), second in shutouts (3) and third in wins (16). All of this while 10^th among goalies in Time Played, and little defensive help. Miller has single-handedly led the Sabres to a Northeast Division lead for much of the first few months of the season, and is surely giving all USA Hockey fans some excited jitters in what is proving to be an exceptional run up to the Olympics in February. Ryan Miller is the clear winner of the quarter-pole Vezina.

Finalists: Ilya Bryzgalov, Phoenix Coyotes (17-8-1, 1.99GAA, .925 Save percentage; Responsible for backstopping the rise of the Coyotes), Martin Brodeur, New Jersey Devils (Setting records on a weekly basis with no signs of slowing; 18 wins are first in the NHL. 2.11GAA, .922 save percentage, and pacing the Devils to first place in the NHL-best Atlantic Division).

Calder Trophy (Best Rookie): Jon Tavares, F, New York Islanders

The number one overall pick in Jon Tavares has more than lived up to his billing on Long Island, easily securing the Calder Trophy at this point in the season. Tavares l

eads all rookies in games played, goals, points, and his six power play goals—also first among rookies—have reinvigorated the Islander power play. More importantly, Tavares has injected life and competition into a bottom-dwelling franchise. One could argue that the Islanders are suffering from Penguins disease—pick high enough in the draft for years on end and you’re bound to win a few games eventually—but Tavares is proving to be a very special player who will be the identity of this hockey club for years to come.

Finalists: James vanRiemsdyk, F, Philadelphia Flyers (Stake rose early with Philadelphia’s success, and Philly’s struggles correspond with his droughts; Leads all rookies with 13 assists), Simeon Varlamov, G, Washington Capitals (Exceptional numbers: 12-1-2, 2.21GAA, .924 Save percentage, but can’t win the award while splitting time with Jose Theodore).

Norris Trophy (Best Defenseman): Duncan Keith, Chicago Blackhawks

The Norris Trophy is less of a numbers game than the other awards, and Duncan Keith will be glad for that. Despite not being much of an offensive power—a respectable 5-18—23—Keith is the rock on a defensive corps that

was tasked with solidifying shaky goaltending this season. The results have been nothing less than outstanding—command of first place in the Central Division, just 64 goals against in 28 games, and a 13-year contract extension for Keith. In a tight contest, Duncan Keith emerges as the quarter season Norris winner.

Finalists: Mike Green, Washington Capitals (Defensive lapses becoming fewer; Again excusable for outstanding offensive numbers—5-25—30 in 29 games; Team’s success largely driven by Gre

en’s ability to move the puck), Dan Boyle, San Jose (Outstanding defensive player dominates all facets of the game; Leads NHL in TOI (26+ minutes per game), third in points among defensemen (25), best defenseman on the NHL’s best team at this point in the season).

Jack Adams Trophy (Best Coach): Joe Sacco, Colorado Avalanche

First-year coach Joe Sacco has returned the Colorado Avalanche to prominence after a noticeable and embarrassing absence from the upper echelons of the Western Conference. Second only to San Jose at this point in the season, Sacco has made use of young players incredibly well, and has finally extracted performance from his goaltenders—a problem that has plagued the team since the lockout. A familiar set of names prowls the bench alongside Sacco—Sylvain Lefebrve, Adam Deadmarsh, Jocelyn Thibault, and Steve Konowalchuk—and all deserve equal credit in earning Sacco the quarter mark Jack Adams.

Finalists: Dave Tippett, Phoenix Coyotes (A close second to Sacco; Has led team from off-season

public embarrassment to a playoff seed in the loaded Western Conference; Makes excellent use of talented and young players), Jacques Lemaire, New Jersey Devils (Same face, different year; In the league’s toughest division and again losing star players through free agency, Lemaire oversees a monster of a franchise whose identity comes and goes with Marty Brodeur; First in the Eastern Conference, and a franchise record for consecutive wins on the road (10).)

Hart Memorial Trophy (MVP): Ryan Miller, Buffalo Sabres

In my opinion, the MVP trophy too often goes to the league’s best player. Generally, the player makes those around him better, but rarely does the MVP go it alone. In other words, if you could possibly vote for two players on the same team for MVP, then neither is the MVP (see Joe Thornton, Dany Heatley, et al). Therefore, for the reasons mentioned above for his Vezina-winning performance, Ryan Miller is the Hart winner at the quarter mark. Miller has little defensive help, and the Sabres are far from an offensive powerhouse (73 goals for is second lowest in the conference in futility on to Carolina). Miller’s contribution to the team’s 62 goals against (second best only to Brodeur’s defensive-minded Devils) is the only reason for the team’s success in the early going.

Finalists: Anze Kopitar, Los Angeles Kings (Leading the resurgent Kings—just four points behind San Jose---by jumping out to an early season NHL-points lead; Since fallen to 7^th with 14-21—35 numbers, 15 power play points, Ryan Smyth’s 23 points are second on the team.), Marian Gaborik, New York Rangers (The oft-injured Gaborik is the steal of the off-season for the Rangers; 21-17—38 in just 27 games; Second in team time-on-ice, first among forwards; team struggles at defensive end continue, but Gaborik is lone answer to offensive problems).

If the playoffs started today:

1) Washington def. 8) Montreal 1) San Jose def. 8) Dallas

2) New Jersey def. 7) Ottawa 2) Colorado def. 7 ) Nashville

3) Boston def. 6) Ottawa 3) Chicago def. 6) Phoenix

5) Atlanta def. 4) Buffalo 4) Calgary def. 5) Los Angeles

1) Washington def. 5) Atlanta 1) San Jose def. 4) Calgary

2) New Jersey def. 3) Boston 3) Chicago def. 2) Colorado

2) New Jersey def. 1) Washington 1) San Jose def. 3) Chicago

1) San Jose def. 2) New Jersey

Bruins Score Early and Often, Take Down Bolts 4-1

Bloggers ignore blog

B's start to play real hockey

lets keep it rolling

Bruins Lose in SO, Narrowly Avoid Historically Bad Shut-Out Streak

On a night that saw the Boston Bruins dominate the scoring chances department, it was this save that kept the B's in it tonight at a critical moment in the second period. Sure, they lost the game. But is anyone else just happy they scored a fucking goal? The Bruins are in sad state of affairs, to be sure.

No one could finish tonight and that proved to be their undoing. The Habs took advantage of the one real bad mistake the Bruins D made at their blue line and sure enough it ends up being enough to get them into a shootout, and eventually the win.

So, there's your silver lining: they played better than they have and score A goal. One. That's it. Wheeee.

Oh, and I think Maxim Lapierre has taken over as my most hated player on the Habs. That guy is a douche.

Numbers That Make Me Puke

02:12:58 - Time played since the last Bruins goal.

0.0512 - Power-play conversion over the past 12 games.

12 - Times I screamed "Fuuuck!" throughout tonight's game.

Bruins Lose Right on the Heels of Yet Another 'Maybe They Figured it Out' Win

In Game: Bruins/Devils

I feel like giving some end-of-period, in game thoughts tonight, so you are the beneficiary of those.

After a period of play the Devils hold a 1-0 lead which, frankly, doesnt at all represent the way play went in that first 20 minutes. Outside of the last 60 seconds, it really felt like the Bruins took a lot of aggressive and smart play to the Devils, keeping the puck in the NJ end for most of the game so far. Unfortunately, a bad decision by Shawn Thornton who was covering for a step up by Andrew Ference led to a three on one and a goal for the Devils.

What was really encouraging was our fore check and puck control in the offensive zone both even strength and on the PP. The Devils play a collapsing form of defense and this places the oweness on the offense to have awareness of open areas and quickly move the puck there to capitalize on excess space left by collapsing defenders. If you can also join this with a physical puck control style, you're in good shape to counter the Devils style of play. Overall, we did a great job of this, but none of the bounces went our way.

Props to Byron Bitz who looked like a dervish out there. It's too bad he got stuck with a minus one as the fourth line gave up the goal, because he played as well as anyone on the ice, particularly on a couple of shifts with his own possession displays down low (tiring out the Devils defenders).

One last thought on the first: Our PP may be turning a corner. Granted, when you're 2 for 27 in an 8 game stretch, calling a turnaround in that trend is the same thing as predicting that a pitcher will throw a strike on a 3-0 count (it's bound to happen eventually). Now that you're past that, let's see if the B's carry over the differences that they seemed to apply in their first man-advantage tonight to the next. For weeks they've been stuck in a rut, not willing to move away from the wing to D pass on the high point and playing a far-too-predictable drawn up play with no movement away from the puck. Tonight, they moved away from the puck, and were willing to drop passes down low opening up the high slot alot more. Let's hope this is a sign that practice is helping (otherwise, i'm gonna start blaming the coaching staff).

End of Second Period: Tied at 1 a piece.

You can see I'm running a diary of "Devils Suck" photos tonight. It really soothes the soul. Another very good period of hockey. A bit more even, but ironically, the Bruins get a goal back following another decent powerplay with Bergeron scoring his fourth of the year. Thomas is looking very good tonight, and necessarily so, of course. It goes without saying that they need him to be on top of his game for the next 4-6 weeks until Savvy and Looch return.

The B's outshot the Devils 13-10 that period and its 25-23 overall now. For a game between these two teams, that is a helluva good dip, er, i mean a helluva lot of offense. Speaking of offense, the three Bruin forwards on the ice for the goal were Ryder, Bergeron and Sturm. I'm sure i'm not alone in saying i really like that line and would think that we could benefit from seeing them together alot more in even strength situations.

One other though, Bob Sweeney just made Kathryn Tappen look retarded, twice. The first time, he hadn't even spoken yet. I'm pretty sure she took that granny outfit off for him before the game.


After Game Thoughts: That guy up there really sucks. Yikes. Can you imagine what his kids look like?

Just a tough loss. I thought we outplayed NJ all night. Sometimes that's not enough. We just missed a number of opportunities, none closer than Chara's deflection that rang off the cross bar with about 40 seconds to play. Forget about the fact that the Linesman just blew a call like he was trying hard to get into an amatuer porn. I won't even begin to say that we'd have scored, but it's a kick when you're down, nonetheless.

This is a team coming together though. Remember, coming out of October last year we were 5-3-3 and then went on a tear. I don't think they're about to do the same, but there's signs of hope.

Reasons I Hate The New Jersey Devils

We all have teams that we hate.

Some are universal: Red Wings, Yankees, anyone who employs Mike Ribiero. Some are more obscure: Canucks (seriously, that old-school sweater looks like what this kid is about to crawl into), Panthers (ridiculously stupid stadium growling noise - NHL & NFL), Hurricanes (the in-excusable discontinuance of the Brass Bonanza).

I hate the New Jersey Devils for a varierty of reasons. Some pretty obvious, some less so. Allow me to elaborate ...

1.) Ruining offensive hockey and creating the lock-out (maybe). Ask anyone to name reasons that hockey was no fun to watch for a good portion of the pre-lockout years and they will will say "not enough scoring". Some of that can be attributed to the clutch/grab stuff but more of it can be attributed to the pervasive neutral-zone trap. Who brought that into the limelight? The Devils. It's easy to do, doesn't require skilled players, and chokes the shit out the offense.

2.) I drafted Patrik Elias in my fantasy league in the fall of 2005. Immediately after making the pick I was informed that he contracted Hepatitis A while playing in Russia, thus making him a perfect waste of space for the majority of the season, and making me the target of many a joke. Thanks, Patrik.

3.) The team is named after this thing. Yes, people think it's real - and maybe it is. But more likely they're just idiots. For comparison's sake, the Bruins are named after a bear. An actual animal, and according to trusted national news agencies, the animal we really need to be worried about.

4.) My good friend, and scribe of Mike Scioscia's Tragic Illness, used to beat me a little more often that I beat him in NHL 00 back when we were in college. His weapon of choice? The Devils. Nothing can make a man more irate than having his best players injured after the whistle by an out of control Scott Stevens. He contends that this is allowed for within the rules of such a contest - we disagree to this day.

Enjoy the game, everyone. I'll have my Elias voodoo doll on hand, so when he goes down in the 2nd holding his groin for no apparent reason you only have me to thank.

GO B's!

Recipe for win: 58.5 minutes of sloppy hockey + Tim Thomas

How did the Bruins manage to escape Scotia Bank Place with 2 points you ask? I am asking the same question this morning. Let's face it, we some some terrible individual performances last night and while i enjoy watching the home town 23 skate every day, I'm damn glad the next 5 days will be practices under coach Julien's supervision.

After fifty eight and a half minutes of terrible hockey, overall (Wheeler's goal was a brief bright spot), the Bruins looked like they were this guy:

Tim Thomas had singlehan- alright, Chara played very well -dedly kept Boston within two goals. All this after the third Ottawa goal went in off one of Thomas' teammates. Dennis Wideman and Derek Morris both played the game as though they were skating in mud or simply didn't want to be there (i was SCREAMING at Wideman to get motivated, i don't think he won a single one on one battle to the puck and YES i saw his helmet come off - he still sucked).

To make matters worse, our coaching staff apparently is more comfortable with a 6 on 5 than they are with a 5 on 4 (more on this in a second). Every Bruins power play was the same predictable pattern. 3 guys stand still down low, while Bergeron and Morris play catch and turn the puck over in a small space at the blue line. We really don't seem comfortable using motion to create space (something we're highly vulnerable of on the PK, so you think we'd have come to recognize it by now!). I can't say enough about how baffled I am that we had so good a PP last year and so bad a PP now. I may have to go research this and then eat a shotgun barrel.

So that brings us to the 6 on 5. Improbably, we spent the last 96 seconds of the game skating as though our lives depended on it and won every conceivable battle to the puck in that timeframe. Derek Morris (previously noted for NOT being a puck moving defenseman) suddenly assumed the form he was advertised to possess and before I knew what was happening, we were tied. NOTE: with 8 minutes to play, i turned my XBOX on. Something, and i don't know what, kept me from turning off the game though. Between this game and the Islanders game, if we're down 2 goals, i'm not changing the channel. They're reaching '04 Red Sox status in my head right now.
A solid overtime period and more heroics from Timmy (who had the save of the year in the second period - i'll post it later today) and a patient shootout goal from Bergy equaled the 2 points.

Phew.

Bruins Lose a Tough One, 4-3 SO Loss to Philly

"What, the FUCK, was that ABOUT?!"
-Lewis Black

I realize that this game earned us a point. I know this. I should be happy, after all the B's were on the road playing in the second of back-to-back games against a team that, at least for now, appears legit.

I am not happy, and too angry to write anything worth reading. Check back tomorrow for something more worth your time.

No game till Friday?

Thank God. Those boys need some practice. After pounding Patron shots during the third period/OT comeback win on Saturday with the Caveman and then watching the Bruins sleep their way through a 4-3 loss to the Avs on Monday, I could use the practice too. That doesn't make any sense.

Look, the B's are flat - plain and simple. They seem to be in the same type of shape they were early last season where they only get up for one period a game. This doesn't bode well for a team that's already played 5 home games and zero on the road. I'm not ready to rant at all but suffice to say i hope Julien is beating the pulp out of the boys this week. Dallas and Phoenix suck and there's no reason we shouldn't take four points home this weekend, three at worst.

Check back Friday for more thoughts.

Bruins Add New Ticket Package - Boobs Now Free!

If it was any secret that girls at hockey games are cooler than girls at just about any other professional sporting event, Barstool Sports has busted the story wide open (relatively NSFW).

If you were puzzled by cheering from the hometown crowd during the Bruins stink-fest of a home opener, perhaps these two ladies were responsible. Come to think of it, this sort of activity actually makes sense, given that the food that comes with the 'Hungry for Hockey' tickets is on par with a strip club buffet.

Anyway, well done, ladies. I'll be in Section 304 on Thursday.

Heroes of Fort Wilderness - B's mess up Canes, 7-2

Remember that part of the Patriot when Mel Gibson and his two pre-adolescent sons save Heath Ledger from 20 redcoats and a hangman's noose? At the end of that scene, Gibson (Benjamin Martin) takes a Cherokee Tomahawk to a redcoat who he'd already wounded, and finishes him off to the tune of 17 or 18 hacks and more blood than a Mike Myers movie. Later in the story we come to discover that this was a resurgence of brutality from his youth whereby he led a platoon of men to take revenge on French/Indian troops at Fort Wilderness after they'd abused a group of English Settlers and left them for dead at another camp. Brutal, but loyal and protective to no end.

Last night, the Bruins began a road towards redemption. Brickley summed it up best in the third, after the 6th Bruin of the night (Matt Hunwick) had dropped a tally in the goal column, when he said "Balance and Depth". That Bruins team reminded us why we fell down a stairwell in love with them last year and introduced some new faces (Hello, Steve Begin: I'll come back to you later) in the process of doing so with a 7-2 scalping of the sorry Carolina Hurricanes; They're basically Tropical Depressions at this point.

My favorite moments weren't the goals, though man were they pretty at times (Savard's feed to Sturm was much more difficult than the casual observer will realize, as was Sturm finishing it off). No, my favorite and i believe the most telling sign that this team is going to be as good as we hope this year came in the second period when old "friend" Andrew "the ankle bender" Alberts took a bit of a high attempted check at Marco Sturm of a faceoff. This was just moments after Lucic had won a game of uncle against Jay Harrison (Harrison was literally begging for mercy at the end, watch below). After Sturm got ran, Marc Savard jumped on Alberts like Quagmire on a panty-less Asian flight attendant. Savard's defensive manuever led to a full on 5 v 5 scrum with the hated Tom Kostopoulos trying to take on Chara's shinpads for a time.



This kind of shellacking is exactly what makes the Bruins good. They're physical, they're smart and they are hard to play against. Most importantly, they don't back down. Savard saw a teammate recently recovered from a season lost to both a head and knee injury get pseudo run (i only denote this because Alberts basically missed, but the intent was there) by a former teammate he knew to be a goon - He didn't hesitate for a moment. Savvy was in on Alberts like he'd talked about his sister. That kind of camaraderie and fight is what makes them big and bad. It's what makes them the Bruins. By the time we were done in this one, it felt as though the Bruins were committing a massacre the likes of which we'd not seen since the days of Benjamin Martin. These guys had stolen our dream last year. They'd punctured our proverbial balloon and then they'd come into our building and tried to run us. Not a chance. Beat 'em on the scoreboard, beat 'em in the fight and beat 'em in their hearts.

The fact that seven different people scored in this one? Well, let's just say it won't be a one man massacre this year. All 23 of these guys want to be that hero of Fort Wilderness, together. Just for good measure, let's all enjoy Shawn Thornton reminding Mr. Alberts why you don't fuck with a man with a Positron Pack on his back.

My Fellow Nerds and I Will Retire to the Nerdery With Our Calculators

It was a rough morning around my house.

Last night started at the Sox game and ended at a law student kegger in Allston, MA. There were a lot of things that took place in between but lets just say drinking was a focal point.

For whatever reason, this hangover got me thinking about statistics. Maybe it was the Beer-aide served out of a plastic bag lined cardboard box, maybe it was how I angry I got about the guy with dual-popped polo collars (Duke colors, too - this was no accident), I don't know.

In any case I went over to Puck Prospectus and started checking out some of their predictions for the year. They just came out with the season previews for all 30 teams - including, of course, your Bruins.

Take a look at the defense:

          2009-2010 VUKOTA Projections

Name            Age  GP     G     A    Pts   GVT
Dennis Wideman  26  77.0  10.9  34.4  45.2  12.7
Zdeno Chara     32  73.8  12.2  33.8  46.1  12.6
Matt Hunwick    24  57.2   6.3  19.9  26.2   7.2
Derek Morris    31  64.7   4.5  15.5  20.0   4.8
Mark Stuart     25  66.6   3.4  10.6  14.0   3.9
Andrew Ference  30  51.4   2.5  12.9  15.5   3.2
Johnny Boychuk  25  27.9   1.6   5.3   6.9   1.4

I've altered the table slightly to fit in this space, but the last stat on the right is Goals Versus Threshold (explained here). It's similar to VORP in baseball and attempts to put a number on how much better any given player is than a replacement.

So Wide-Man projects to be just as valuable as Chara in 2009, at least according to this metric. We'll certainly see how the whole thing shakes out. He's got the talent and if he can stay consistent and healthy then I don't see why he can't build on last year's success.

Like all projections, it's just that, an educated guess. Perhaps the nerds won't win. Perhaps I won't drink Beer-aide out of a garbage bag lined box. It's really all up in the air at this point.

Check out the season preview and projection article on the Bruins, lot's of great stuff in there, as usual. In any case, we've got a big revenge game against the Canes tonight. Remember Scott Walker?

Game Notes Haiku: We'll Start on the Road Again Next Year , Thank You

Season starts tonight

Ovechkin got the memo

No one told the B's

Opening Night - Jitters, Thoughts, Kid's Names

I've decided to spare you all the 200 page novel of a season preview I've been dreaming about writing. Thank me later. This is my version of a cut to the chase, season opening post. Man, I'm more jittery and nervous than a paparazzi taking photo's of a Brady/Bundchen dinner party.

The Bruins kick off the 2009-10 season tonight against the hated, but very talented, Washington Capitals and the most entertaining player in hockey, Ovie. A few questions have been running through B's fans head's these last few weeks, so let me give you some answers while you stir about your office trying to look busy until pregame. Just try not to think about the fact that you named your newborn son Kessel.

How do we assess the team and its moves...?

1. Kessel Trade - look, this was inevitable. You need to look no further than the descrepancy between Krecji's contract and Kessel's deal in Toronto to understand the overwhelming fact in this case: Peter Chiarelli knows what he's doing. I'm starting to develop a Scott Pioli/Bill Belichek type trust for his business decision making (don't get me started on Derek Morris though, he's the Joey Galloway of the Bruins until proven otherwise). Straight up, i'm dissappointed that i'll have to re-thread my Kessel jersey, but the guy had to go and they got a very good return considering the economic condition of the league.

2. The Goal Scoring - the Bruins didn't do much to bolster their front line scoring potential. I know what you're thinking, "Bonesaw, come on, maybe Steve Begin will be this year's Michael Ryder". If that's your thought process, go ahead and take that last step off the Tobin and rid us all of your bullshit. Fact is, the Bruins didn't need to bolster this. There, i said it. Between the return of Sturm (the team's leading goal scorer in 07-08) and the eventual re-emergence of Bergeron we'll be well on the way to making up for that production lost in the Kessel trade. I haven't even mentioned the growth of guys like Wheeler (totally fell off in the second half after hitting the rookie wall around game 50 last year) and Krejci. Plus, we don't need to score as much. Why?

3. Defense/Goaltending - Funny you should ask. Few teams can win both the Jennings and Vezina trophies in a season and actually have BETTER goaltending the following season. But, the Bruins will have exactly that. Now, i'm not guaranteeing both trophies show up again, but Rask is the real deal. I watched him shutout the Rangers 1-0 last year while turning back 41 shots and he is hands down a better keeper than Fernandez. Consider that along with the fact that he's in a contract year and knows that the starting job for 2011 and beyond is his to lose (Timmy has one year left and will be 36 next season), Rask will prove himself and will make Timmy better at the same time.
As for defense, we lost a slow old man in Aaron Ward and replaced him with a slow middle aged guy, in Derek Morris. Otherwise, we get better with age because the combination of Wideman, Hunwick and Stuart all project to improve on solid seasons last year.

I think that's enough food for though for one day. We're all gonna have to wait and see how things like Sturm/Lucic/Savard and the D-pairings play out, but rest assured, this team is going to continue to step in the right direction. We don't need 116 point season to get better this year. We need to solidify the experience they've acquired in the last two post-seasons, win the Northeast handily and be healthy come playoff time. Game 1 of 82, at a minimum is tonight. Let's drop the fucking puck already.